I hear everyone getting annoyed with me. I see everyone escaping. I'm sick of being the kid who pours out his emotions on his blog at the end of the day. Especially when it's always negative. I'm sick of listening to me as much as everyone else. Apologies.
Everyone's going places. I don't mean physically, even though in most cases that holds true. I mean they are getting the shit done that they want to do. They are working hard to go to the schools that they want to transfer to. They are working hard to achieve the dreams that they dream. My dream and my place is New York. I know I'll make it there one day. But it's at least two years away. I don't know if that's why I'm upset. It might just be that no one is working hard to get to me. They are working hard at leaving me. Everyone.
Just leave. Go. What difference will it make? You say, I won't have any friends. What do you call this? This isn't a friendship. I'm just a stand in. When there is no one else for you to turn to, I am there. But who is there when I'm all alone. Not you. Just go.
You want to know why I ask you if I annoy you so much? Because I genuinely think I annoy the shit out of you. It's not hard to catch on to. You aren't a Shakespearean novel. Your a high school English paper...transparent and not funny. I'm sick of this bullshit of a friendship where I crack my ass for your attention and acceptance to only get half ass responses. I'm not asking for your fucking love you faggot. I'm just asking that you stop telling me to drag race towards the edge of a cliff and then get dissapointed when I rev the engine. Fuck you. All I'm asking is for the truth when you can supply it. Step up or shut the fuck up.
I'm not even angry about this anymore but...I like the part about being an English paper.
Happiness. I hate how foreign of an emotion it is. But I love when it chooses to pay me a visit. It's been with me for about a week now. Definitely won't be kicking it off my couch any time soon. Unless it eats my fruit loops.
I am officially the worst blogger ever. I am going to change that. Expect more writing this round. I'm going to be posting my random little tantrums from the past couple months. I'm not depressed like that at the moment so don't call a hotline.
I'm on that low now. Making myself feel like nothing. Making myself question everything. I don't know why I beat myself up. Why can't I love myself as much as I want? What's in the way? The Bible tells me that Jesus loves me...so why can't I?
I am an aspiring photographer. I go to the University of North Texas and I am a photojournalism major with a minor in anthropology. One day, I would like to be a photographer on staff of a fashion magazine. Or even just working in the art department of a magazine.